How can I be Generous to my Partner?

by rodney on December 1, 2014

how to be generous with your partnerI read an article recently that revealed that two qualities that couples in successful long term relationships have are generosity and kindness.

After helping couples who are in emotional crises for the past few years, I tend to agree. Generosity and kindness is needed to build and maintain strong, healthy and long lasting relationships.

I want to take a minute to look at generosity.

So, what is generosity?

Generosity is the habit of giving to someone in need. This is important are all about give and take. In fact, you need to give more than you take. This is where a lot of couples I see go wrong.

A lot couples don’t give to their partner because of the fear that their partner will not give back. This fear will cause stinginess and prevent you from feeling safe to give to  them. Also, a lot of couples who do give to their partner, do so with the expectation of receiving something return, whether it’s affection, support, sex or love. You can’t be generous by expecting something in return. Just like you can’t give to someone out of obligation.

Now that you know what not to do, here’s 3 ways you can be more generous to your partner

Give your time

Time is only commodity that is limited. We all only get 24 hours a day and once they’re gone, they’re gone forever. Therefore, your time is the most precious gift you can give to anyone. Spending quality time with your partner is the still the best way to build a strong relationship as you build rapport, trust and intimacy.

Give your Support

Your partner needs to safe. In order to feel safe they need to feel that they are accepted and a sense of belonging. They need to not be criticised and feel insecure. You can do this by giving your full support to your partner. Let them know that whatever happens that you have their back and that you’re there when they need you.

Give your love

This may seem like a no brainer but it’s amazing how many couples don’t give their love. This is the most important thing in relationships– love. Couples often withhold love by withholding affection, emotions, dreams and thoughts.  They withhold love by not being open.  Be open with your partner, share your thoughts, your emotions and your affection. Give it freely and generously.

 

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