Why people seek counselling

by rodney on January 11, 2015

womans-cryingIf I had a dollar for everytime I heard someone say “I don’t need counselling” I’d be rich. Like sleeping
with supermodels rich. Yes, I have heard it a lot and often I hear it when I tell people that I’m a
counsellor.

When casually ask as to why not the response is “I’m not that bad” or “I’m not crazy”. The belief
they have is that before they need to come and see a counsellor, they have to be mentally ill, on the
ground in the foetal position rocking backwards and forwards or about to jump in front of a train.
This simply isn’t the case. None of my clients come close to fitting that description. In fact, I would
hope you call me before you get to that state.

So who are my clients and what’s wrong with them? I can’t tell you that, however, I can share with
you the top 5 reasons people give when coming to see me.

1. I don’t know, something’s just not right.

It is incredibly common for people to not know exactly what’s wrong. All they know is
something’s not right, they’re not happy, they feel sad, they’re flat, whatever they are
experiencing. When I get talking to them I discover there’s a few different issues that have
gotten worse over time, and they didn’t even realise it. Once I help them see what the issues
are, then I can help them resolve their issues.

2. I’m angry/sad/depressed (insert appropriate emotion)

A lot of people are experiencing a lot of negative emotion that they don’t know how to deal
with, especially men, who are taught from a young age to suppress these sorts of emotions.
They just need some help to process and cope with them.

3. I just needed someone to talk to

We all need someone to talk to. Talking helps us to vent, process and deal with emotions
and events that happen to us. A lot of the time, people feel like they can’t talk to family and
friends because of judgement, stigma or just plain fear. Having someone who is outside of
our circle who can provide a different perspective in a safe environment can make a huge
difference.

4. I don’t want my marriage to end

A lot of couples I see are on the brink of separation. They tend to fight a lot, disagree on
everything and they can’t see a way out. I can help to either fix the relationship, or help
them end it. The sad thing is, had they seen me earlier, like before it got worse or even just
as a tune up, I could have prevented it from getting this bad.

5. I’m worried about someone else

I also have many clients who don’t have a problem themselves but they are trying to help a
Partner, a child, a sibling whatever. For some reason that person won’t seek help
themselves, but I can help others to help this person too.

Everyone who comes to see me are normal everyday people like you and me and I can help them
with the same issues we all have. You don’t have to wait for it to get really bad before you seek
counselling, in fact the earlier you come the better.

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